Are you the person you want to be?

Are you the person you want to be? Obviously, many already are or always were, so good! But many are still trying to reach a specific way or position :)
Filigree golden earrings, I found them so nice!

Filigree golden earrings, I found them so nice!

Oh, the ego, always that :) Are you the person you want to be, do you feel afraid to take the first step to it, do you follow what other people want from you or are you guided by the ego? That has to do with other people’s wishes, marketing manipulating us, to compete in a consumerist, image guided society. The ego is how we prefer to think of ourselves and others to think of us (generalizing, of course). People who think of themselves as specially important invest heavily on creating an image of themselves to others, even if it costs their last cents.

The ego is also a defense against shame, mainly over loss of status. Trying to avoid shame by seeking status creates a false and fragile feeling. Psychologists call it impression management. If you don’t agree with the “special person”, they call you enemy :) Do you know anybody like this?

November is also a month for the Remembrance Day, by wearing a remembrance poppy :)

Remembrance poppy


I love A-line floral dresses - Hering. Asos underneath tank top to cover the cleavage, I don't like cleavages

I love A-line floral dresses – Hering. Asos underneath tank top to cover the cleavage, I don’t like cleavages

Miss Sixty boots and dot tights

Miss Sixty boots and dot tights

I really don't understand the velvet "new trend". I never stopped wearing it, like this jacket (also here). C & A Hanover

I really don’t get the velvet “new trend”. I never stopped wearing it (also here, here and here). C & A Hanover. But I am glad there are more pieces to buy now, with the trend

I wa slooking for a bag before going out and got this. Yes, black would have been better, but I like mis-matched things anyway. This one is made of wooden beads, bought from an artisan

I was looking for a bag before going out and got this. Yes, black would have been better, but I like mis-matched things anyway. This one is made of wooden beads, bought from an artisan

DIY Moment

I don't wear short dresses, so I asked my seamstress to add a piece of lace to make the hem longer!

I don’t wear short dresses, so I asked my seamstress to add a piece of lace to make the hem longer!

Finishing Touch and Mood of the Week

Quote Happiness

Wishing you a fantastic week with many smiles! Thanks for the sweet comments!

See you on Friday, with Friday Feelings! 

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52 thoughts on “Are you the person you want to be?

  1. Hi Denise! Luckily I haven’t know such a “special person” yet, but on the other hand I saw many of them in my favourite tv series and personally I don’t want to be a peson, who pretends someone else and who hides “real me” from the society. I agree with you that marketing is manipulating us and it’s one of the cause of this impression management. What’s more, I adore your dress, adding lace was great idea, btw, A-line dresses generally suits to you, dear! In addition, I love the quote and I totally share your point of view – comparing isn’t good thing,we shouldn’t compare ourseself with the others, because each person is unique and special.
    Have a lovely day Denise!

  2. I don’t think I’ll ever reach that person I would like to be, but oddly I’m also not sure what that person I’m aspiring to be is either. Does that make sense? Seems an odd sate of affairs, Denise, lol! I do know people with massive egos who always have to ‘appear’ to be a step ahead of you, controlling and always trying to get one over you. Underneath though they are sad people with empty personalities and fragile senses of self worth. I’m talking about sociapaths. I’ve known a few in my life! Big hugs Denise xxx

  3. Such an interesting post, Denise! I truly believe that one should always find themselves first. A lot people take society’s opinion to heart which is not always the right thing to do because only you know yourself best. On a different note: You look beautiful! Like a ray of sunshine!
    Happy Monday, love!
    xoxo, Vanessa

  4. Come sempre offri degli ottimi spunti di riflessione cara Denise!
    Io non credo di esser ancora diventata la persona che vorrei essere, ma penso di stare sulla buona strada! Insomma ho un’idea abbastanza precisa di quelle che sono le qualità che vorrei avere ed i difetti che non mi piacciono e lavoro (o almeno ci provo) costantemente per cercare di migliorare!
    Del giudizio della gente e della società mi interessa poco (e non lo dico tanto per dire), tanto che ho da “guadagnarci”? Ormai ho capito che non sono costretta a frequentare chi non mi piace e che sforzarsi di piacere agli altri è fatica sprecata, tanto ci sarà sempre qualcuno a cui non vai bene!
    Naturalmente tratto chiunque con educazione e rispetto, e cerco sempre di non fare del male a nessuno, ma comunque faccio e decido di testa mia!
    In fondo se l’ego ce l’abbiamo a qualcosa di buono servirà ti pare? 😉

    PS: Sei bellissima con quegli orecchini, denise! Sembri una principessa orientale! 😀

  5. I’ve seen a lot of ego through musicians I have met. To a certain extent, many need it to get through in the ‘business’! There are still many nice musicians too!
    I’m not so keen on velvet, I find it a bit clingy but it looks gorgeous on other people such as YOU!!!

  6. It’s hard to remember not to compare yourself to others, but without doubt it’s the road to happiness if we can learn to be ourselves – I think it’s a life long work, for me anyway, to finally get to who I want to be.
    I love the bag by the way – the pop of colour really sets off the outfit – you look great :)

  7. you look so stunning in that floral dress! Great idea to add a touch of lace to it. This is such a feminine and chic styling, just my cup of tea:)…I really really like it. So pretty!!!!

    Interesting article as well! I’m not sure am I the person I want to be. Sometimes I feel like I can take on the world and sometimes I’m not so sure:), but I think this is normal. There are some things about myself that I would like to change, but …perhaps all will work out in due time? I’m a great believer in organic changes, one that happen gradually and with time…because they seem more meaningful to me. Some things just take time.

    I consider myself a work in progress!!!!

  8. I am not currently the person i want to be because I feel like there are still so many ways I could grow. At the same time however I feel like there would always be place for growth and I don’t want to ever stop evolving, so I guess I am the person I want to be. A person that is looking to grow and become the best person they can be.
    I’ve met one of those “special person” before. They can actually fixate on you if they consider you enemy. They try to turn other people against you.

    You look really lovely Denise. I love you boots and you DIY. :)
    Have a nice Wednesday!
    Sauniya | Find Your Bliss ♡

  9. Interesting topic, Denise. Honestly I have never thought of such a thing about myself, I am what I am. Period. That’s for my private life, if you are talking about professional life, career and such, I still have goals, I am still not at the top of the ladder, but as I said in the above, that concerns only my career. Anyway, as anyone else I know such people but I do not suffer fools gladly and such people are fools, imho. Anyhow, my dear blogger friend you look adorable today and I love the add of the lace hem. Thse booties are cute and so are you and also very beautiful, Denise.

  10. Liebe Denise, ich bin auch sehr glücklich, dass Samt wieder so in Mode ist! Du siehst wunderschön aus und ich liebe alles, was Du trägst! Ich denke, ich wäre gerne ein besserer Mensch :) Mir fällt nur auf, umso länger ich lebe, desto schwerer fällt es mir, mich zu verstellen, ganz egal was mein Umfeld von mir fordert 😉 Ich wünsche Dir noch eine wunderbare Woche, Goldstück <3
    Liebe Grüße, Rena

  11. I wear vests under clothes that show too much cleavage, too 😉 This is a really interesting post, I think I do live to please others in some ways but I’m definitely getting better at putting myself first and not doing what’s considered “normal”.

    • Muchas gracias! Eres siempre tan amable y tus palabras son siempre muy lindas, que hacen sonreir! Seguiremos siempre siendo amigos, es una bendicion! Un maravilloso fin de semana pa ti y los tuyos!

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